Wednesday 18 May 2016

Open Windows - by Sharon Flood Kasenberg

Open Windows:

Behind windows
shuttered tight -
all your sorrows
out of sight.
Thick, dark curtains
keep out light;
no discerning
day or night.
Don't you wish to
see the sun?
Or see stars when
day is done?
So much out there
that you shun -
where in your life
is the fun?
Fling wide curtains -
windows too!
There's so much to
see and do.
Let the sunlight
warm you through -
shine upon you;
make you new.
To fresh breezes
bare your soul.
Let the wind be
in control.
Learn to with the
punches roll.
Adaptation
is your goal.
Sorrows leave through
doors ajar -
breezes catch them;
bear them far.
Part the curtains,
wish on star -
re-engage with
who you are.
Face yourself in
morning light
without anger,
sorrow; fright.
Let stars guide you
through the night.
Open windows -
and take flight.

Sharon Flood Kasenberg, August 29, 2015

I've been paying a lot more attention to the world outside my windows since we put our house on the market.

When our realtor first came by to list the property, he emphasized the importance of keeping the blinds and curtains open to let in the sunlight. So, for the past two weeks, I've made a concentrated effort to bare my windows every morning. Oddly, although one of the things I've always liked about this house is its nice big windows - I've usually kept most of them covered. Now I wish that I'd spent more time experiencing this home at its sunshiny best.

My windows provide pleasant views. From those at the front of the house I see my street, lined with maple trees and flowers coming to life - at last! (Spring has had a slow start here.) I get a good view of several houses on my street - all well tended. This is a neighbourhood where homes and gardens get plenty of love. Sometimes I see people out walking - getting a bit of exercise - or maybe just making sure their dog gets some. Before we got the eaves trough fixed I enjoyed watching the birds bathe where the water wasn't draining well. There's always something to see just outside any front door - if you're paying attention.

The views from the back of my house are even nicer. I love to look out at my garden  - especially at this time of year when there are daily changes to observe - new buds and fresh growth. It's inspiring to watch a garden progress through the seasons. And since my house is built on higher ground than the ones behind it, I can admire the trees and flowers in my neighbours' backyards too. When I look beyond those houses I see lofty trees in the conservation area behind them. I wish now that I'd spent more time admiring the scenery that's always been outside those windows.

The unfettered views I've experienced from within the walls of my home have become a metaphor for opening my eyes to the sheer magnificence of my surroundings.  Like those heartwarming sights that always existed behind my pulled down blinds, there's a whole world outside that I took for granted far too long. Over the past few years that's changed, and now every time my husband and I hop in the car to take one of our "Corn and Beans Tours" - which is what we call our drives through farm country - I'm astounded by the beauty of the area I live in. I love to see the fields of crops, the gracious farmhouses; the rolling hills. I love seeing gardens and rivers and Mennonites in their buggies. I pay attention to the changes in the landscape, and I totally groove on exploring the small towns we drive through. I feel badly for those who don't take time to explore - and appreciate - the area they live in.

My exposed windows also represent my own increased self-awareness. For several years I've been on a journey of internal exploration, and I see myself, and feel that I'm also seen, more clearly. As my sons grew into adulthood and my role changed, leaving me with a lot more time to ponder my future, examine thoughts and feelings and develop talents. Pursuing my own interests doesn't feel as selfish as it once did, and I now have time to dream - and motivation to make at least some of those dreams a reality. My husband and I have set a few goals for the future, and we hope our next home will give us the flexibility we require to accomplish them. I find myself more "open" to possibilities - which has, in turn - opened my imagination to all kinds of creative thoughts and fanciful musings. My renewed enthusiasm for the future feels like a sweet breeze though an open window.

My heart seems to have become more open too. In youth I loved carefully. I loved my family, cared about my friends, and enjoyed the kind of narcissistic life that - thankfully - most of us grow out of. Lately I find my heart willing to give more people a chance for a peep inside, and more full of empathy for the plights of others. Now it lets in the fresh air of hope, the cooling breeze of kindness, and the beautiful vistas of tolerance and hope. It also provides better ventilation by letting out "stale air" - like anger, frustration and negativity.

I've always been stubborn, but I think my mind is beginning to open. In my younger years I was much more capable of shutting out uncomfortable truths. I lived in a self imposed Google filter bubble where facts or ideas that didn't support my world view were hastily obscured. With a vicious tug of the blinds I could ignore them. Likewise, things that challenged me to think too hard were rejected. I didn't want to accept that I might not be smart enough to grasp important ideas, so anything I couldn't understand was simply deemed unimportant. As a result, I've slammed that particular window shut on way too many opportunities. But somewhere along the way I've become just wise enough to see how much wisdom I'm lacking, and just confident enough to know I can still learn new things. I can stretch my tired old brain cells to acquire new skills - and that excites me.

As I've become more like an open window - by opening myself to increased appreciation for the world around me and opening my heart and mind to fresh new thoughts and ideas - something wonderful is happening. I see all the beauty that was always there. I think more meaningful thoughts. I feel energized, alert and optimistic.

I missed so much when I kept the blinds closed - we all do. But it seems that most of us are inclined to close ourselves off. We don't want to feel vulnerable by showing others what we feel, so we draw the curtains. We don't want want conflict from those who don't share our opinions, so we yank down the blinds. We feel that we're too busy to pay attention to the world around us, so we wear "blinders" (which often resemble cell phones and headphones), and we ignore the scenery. We don't want to be inclusive, so we turn a blind eye to those we deem too different. We don't want to be challenged, so we lock the shutters that we use to protect our minds from new ideas. Too many of us are simply afraid to really see or be seen.

Draw the curtains and open the blinds!

Open your eyes, your mind, and your heart  to the infinite possibilities in the universe - and optimism will take flight in you too.



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