@fifty-five:
In youth a choir seemed to jeer and taunt,
"You'll never get the future that you want!"
Thus in the grip of fear I oft' was held,
and to its whims my mind was oft' compelled.
For far too long my brain would not believe
life offered more than my heart could conceive -
so limited my life in terms of scope
that I could not believe that faith was hope.
The world was just too horrid to behold -
and human weakness couldn't be controlled.
But as I aged I finally observed
some things that left me thoroughly unnerved -
for there is beauty when the heart can see
there's goodness in much of humanity,
and seeing this, plant seeds of faith anew
that prompt us to our old beliefs review.
And so at length I chose another path -
and rid myself of earlier self-wrath
by offering upon a blazing pyre
the effigies of those predictions dire
which kept me so encumbered by their chains
that I could never seize the offered reins.
Now heart has followed where my mind did lead,
and from past misconceptions I am freed!
At last I hear a very different choir
sing choruses to heart and mind inspire.
This truth is simple - and so elegant -
In my own life I can be celebrant!
I can plan both the journey and the route,
and no one ever really ought to doubt
that my own compass tells me where to go -
for I know best the soil where I will grow!
And here I'll build the future that I want
whatever voices choose to jeer or taunt.
By Sharon Flood Kasenberg
Today I celebrate my fifty-fifth birthday, and I'm giving myself a gift. I'm freeing myself from a weight I've carried for over a year, lifting it off my shoulders and dropping it at your feet...
For a very long time my blog posts have talked about change, and I've alluded to the fact that I've made many changes in my life. Some of these changes have been obvious - like the fact that I moved. I'm living a whole different life now - embracing small town atmosphere and working toward the dream of breathing new life into our old Victorian house so that some day it can be a source of income as well as a happy home.
But there has been one source of change in my life that I was loathe to share publicly - afraid that some of you would see me differently, and maybe stop listening to me. Maybe you'd decide my posts weren't worth reading, or that we couldn't be friends anymore if I told you this. Furthermore, I've been afraid that in telling you this truth you'd see me as a sinner, a traitor, or a coward, because there are some who say that's what I am now. I hope you're not one of them. You see, no matter what changes I've made in my life, if I ever considered you a true friend that hasn't changed. And it won't change - even if you feel that we no longer have anything in common once I say this...
I no longer belong to any church. You read that right. (Whew - I said it!)
I was born and raised in a faith that was my whole world for most of my life. My church was my community, and my sense of purpose revolved around service in my church. My identity was enmeshed in membership in my church. I was proud to belong.
Until things changed. My husband stopped attending and I felt judged by many because he'd rejected the faith. And over the years a lot of the things I was raised to believe stopped resonating with me. Not because I sinned, because honest to goodness, I live the most squeaky clean life you can imagine. That hasn't changed one whit, and isn't likely to. What many of you may not have understood was that I've always had my own moral compass leading my life. The things I chose not to indulge in were things I simply never wanted. I made my own choices. The church was never my crutch, never my reason for saying no or yes. So believe me when I tell you that I still live as I always have.
How can my life still be rewarding without faith? I know that's a question some of you will ask, and I have an answer. My life is not without faith! I have my very own theology - perhaps I always did. I have faith in the goodness of humanity, and genuinely believe there are more kind and decent people in the world than there are mean, nasty people wanting to hurt me, or anyone else. I really see that goodness in people now that I'm less concerned about what they do or don't believe, and merely focus on their words and deeds. I have a lot more faith in myself too, now that I've embraced my ignorance and admitted that I don't have all the answers. There is a great sense of freedom in saying out loud - "I just don't know!" I feel more content with my life now that I focus on merely being a good person, rather than worrying about achieving any level of perfection in this life or any other. My only competition now is with myself as I strive to be better than I was the day before.
I've always tried not to lie or cheat or hurt others - and that's why it's been so hard to keep this to myself for as long as I have. I have no desire to hurt any of you who still believe the things I used to believe. I didn't make any grand announcement on Facebook because I was afraid that my decision to leave would somehow offend you. But by keeping this to myself I was hurting me. It bothered me to let you think I hadn't changed. It made me feel like I was being a traitor to myself. It made me feel guilty for following my conscience and doing what I felt was right. I hated feeling that many of you felt safe in the assumption that in spite of all the change I alluded to, that hadn't changed. So now I'm being honest - for my sake and yours.
I resigned in October of 2015.
I don't want to go into all of the reasons I resigned my membership, but it wasn't a decision I made lightly. I don't want to engage in debate, or influence anybody else to come to the same conclusions that I have. I can live with the fact that we see things differently. Please don't feel badly. Don't shed tears for me, or pray for me to have a change of heart and come back. My heart has already changed - in wonderful, meaningful ways. Every person I ever loved is still loved - and perhaps loved better. My heart seems to have more room in it for love since I stopped trying to force myself to believe things that just didn't seem right to me. I'm happy. I feel that my life has purpose and direction. My conscience is alive and well, and I trust it to keep me living as I should.
It hurts me that some of you won't feel the same toward me now that you know I've left the church. Just remember that this change came a while ago, and that many of you have been interacting with me since I ceased being a member - and you were none the wiser. That's because I'm still the same person I always was. We still have common life experiences and interests and ideas to draw upon, and we can still be friends. This doesn't have to be a big deal.
I still love you, and I'm sorry if this news shocks you or makes you feel sad. That wasn't my intention at all. It's just that I'm fifty-five... old enough to know my own heart, and finally brave enough to speak my own truth. I needed to be able to say this, and couldn't feel free of the weight I carried until I did. I hope you can understand that.
I have enough faith to believe that most of you will choose to love me anyway - the ball is in your court.
Thanks for listening and not judging.
Sharon
Wednesday 25 January 2017
Saturday 14 January 2017
Toastmasters Take on the Common Cold - by Sharon Flood Kasenberg
The Common Cold
Who would have thought the common cold
could ever yield comedic gold?
But for those who wish to orate
the subject matter proved just great,
and somehow from this common thread
a lot of funny things were said.
We laughed at symptoms - cough and sneeze,
and at outrageous remedies
well guarded in some secret vault -
and laughter - how it does exalt!
Somehow a subject quite mundane
moved all into some fresh terrain -
promoting potions meant to heal
the varied aches and pains we feel.
And once our fancies took to flight,
Toastmasters chuckled all the night!
Those words - like mucus, phlegm and spit
embellish speeches quite a bit -
but best of all? The word catarrh -
a true vocabulary star!
A wonderful way to explain
an inflammation of membrane
from stuff that plugs the human nose
which each into a tissue blows.
The beauty then, of Thursday nights
is finding such profound delights
among folk not afraid to reach
for fodder for another speech!
By Sharon Flood Kasenberg, Jan 13, 2017
My husband and I have been looking for ways to meet people and get involved in the area since we moved to North Perth. Atwood doesn't have a lot happening, except the Lion's Club, which my husband promptly joined. (It's an "Atwood thing", we were told. Men in this town pretty well all become Lions or sign on as volunteer firemen, and since Todd is asthmatic and doesn't do ladders well, the choice seemed clear.) That helped Todd integrate, but I knew that I also needed to develop some interests outside my door, but still close to home.
While scouring a local community bulletin, I discovered that Listowel, a more bustling town just five minutes away, was looking for Toastmasters to join their local group. I've had some experience with public speaking, and for many years considered the possibility of becoming a Toastmaster to hone my skills. I thought it seemed like a possible way to meet nice people too, so I decided to check out the Linguists of Listowel and see what they were all about. Since I don't drive, Todd brought me to the first meeting, but as we were driving home he said he'd let Toastmasters be "my thing" if I wanted to join on my own. (He didn't want to cramp my style.) However, since we'd both enjoyed the experience that evening I told him I'd be happy to try something new and different with him. (Words every man married for decades longs to hear, right?!)
At our first meeting we didn't know what to expect, but we were seated beside experienced members of the group who explained each portion of the evening to us. We met a room full of warm and welcoming people who were encouraging with each other, and a lot more interested in pointing out each others' strengths than offering harsh criticisms of perceived weaknesses. We both left there feeling good about learning how to speak in front of these people. When we returned the following week we were greeted like old friends.
We've been involved for about a month now, and Thursday night's meeting was so much fun! The topic for the evening was "The Common Cold", which (I have to confess) didn't seem very inspired to me. I was asked to read something for the Literary Corner - choose any written passage and read it to the group - four minutes maximum. I got nervy and chose to read one of my own blog posts. I wasn't sure how well my efforts would be received, but I forged ahead and felt my post was well received. My husband was asked to be Grammarian - the member who enriches vocabulary by introducing a new word to the group, then counts how many times people fit that word into their comments, and also keeps track of the use of filler words (like um and eh) that speakers use that evening so that we all learn to root out negative speech habits.
In keeping with the theme of the evening, he chose the word catarrh - "inflammation of mucus membranes and nasal passages". Needless to say, that word got well used by every person present. The subject of colds, cold symptoms and cold remedies was a source of much amusement as the night progressed. A toast was made to Canada, for opening the country's secret vault of the best 150 home remedies ever. Our chair for the evening regaled us with fun facts about obscure cold remedies, and our Table Topics Master invented a fun game where he passed around two envelopes - one contained slips of paper naming common cold symptoms, and the other contained slips denoting unusual cold remedies. Our task was to remove one slip from the first "symptom" envelope, name and wax somewhat poetic about our symptom, and then spend the balance of the allotted two minutes explaining how the randomly-pulled cold remedy from the next envelope helped cure us - or didn't.
It's hard to maintain composure while people are talking about using outlandish home remedies like horseradish, or onion necklaces, to cure their cold symptoms. And the hilarity continued when people described exactly how they'd use each remedy to obtain relief. Snort that elderberry juice up your nose - it'll clear up the pesky catarrh in your sinus cavity! Bite into a clove of garlic - munch down that sucker like it's an apple - by golly it'll clear up your cough - and as an added benefit, continued use will keep anyone from ever getting close enough to share a germ with you again! Does chicken soup sound like a boring cure? Not if it's made with the recipe we heard! We also learned that French Canadians substitute gin for whisky in their Hot Toddies, and that the word catarrh just never gets old.
I would never have dreamed that so much laughter could ensue from discussion of the common cold, but we managed it.
There were serious moments in the evening too. One member gave a heartfelt speech about the importance of giving blood. It was well thought out and delivered. My own contribution was more serious than most of the rest of the evening too, but what I've discovered about Toastmasters is that every speech - be it serious or silly - has its merits. Whether we spend the evening laughing or nodding in serious agreement, everyone leaves edified. And fed with yummy snacks too! I think it's safe to say that each Linguist of Listowel learns something new every Thursday night, and leaves feeling good about what they experienced.
What better way could there be to spend a Thursday night?
Who would have thought the common cold
could ever yield comedic gold?
But for those who wish to orate
the subject matter proved just great,
and somehow from this common thread
a lot of funny things were said.
We laughed at symptoms - cough and sneeze,
and at outrageous remedies
well guarded in some secret vault -
and laughter - how it does exalt!
Somehow a subject quite mundane
moved all into some fresh terrain -
promoting potions meant to heal
the varied aches and pains we feel.
And once our fancies took to flight,
Toastmasters chuckled all the night!
Those words - like mucus, phlegm and spit
embellish speeches quite a bit -
but best of all? The word catarrh -
a true vocabulary star!
A wonderful way to explain
an inflammation of membrane
from stuff that plugs the human nose
which each into a tissue blows.
The beauty then, of Thursday nights
is finding such profound delights
among folk not afraid to reach
for fodder for another speech!
By Sharon Flood Kasenberg, Jan 13, 2017
My husband and I have been looking for ways to meet people and get involved in the area since we moved to North Perth. Atwood doesn't have a lot happening, except the Lion's Club, which my husband promptly joined. (It's an "Atwood thing", we were told. Men in this town pretty well all become Lions or sign on as volunteer firemen, and since Todd is asthmatic and doesn't do ladders well, the choice seemed clear.) That helped Todd integrate, but I knew that I also needed to develop some interests outside my door, but still close to home.
While scouring a local community bulletin, I discovered that Listowel, a more bustling town just five minutes away, was looking for Toastmasters to join their local group. I've had some experience with public speaking, and for many years considered the possibility of becoming a Toastmaster to hone my skills. I thought it seemed like a possible way to meet nice people too, so I decided to check out the Linguists of Listowel and see what they were all about. Since I don't drive, Todd brought me to the first meeting, but as we were driving home he said he'd let Toastmasters be "my thing" if I wanted to join on my own. (He didn't want to cramp my style.) However, since we'd both enjoyed the experience that evening I told him I'd be happy to try something new and different with him. (Words every man married for decades longs to hear, right?!)
At our first meeting we didn't know what to expect, but we were seated beside experienced members of the group who explained each portion of the evening to us. We met a room full of warm and welcoming people who were encouraging with each other, and a lot more interested in pointing out each others' strengths than offering harsh criticisms of perceived weaknesses. We both left there feeling good about learning how to speak in front of these people. When we returned the following week we were greeted like old friends.
We've been involved for about a month now, and Thursday night's meeting was so much fun! The topic for the evening was "The Common Cold", which (I have to confess) didn't seem very inspired to me. I was asked to read something for the Literary Corner - choose any written passage and read it to the group - four minutes maximum. I got nervy and chose to read one of my own blog posts. I wasn't sure how well my efforts would be received, but I forged ahead and felt my post was well received. My husband was asked to be Grammarian - the member who enriches vocabulary by introducing a new word to the group, then counts how many times people fit that word into their comments, and also keeps track of the use of filler words (like um and eh) that speakers use that evening so that we all learn to root out negative speech habits.
In keeping with the theme of the evening, he chose the word catarrh - "inflammation of mucus membranes and nasal passages". Needless to say, that word got well used by every person present. The subject of colds, cold symptoms and cold remedies was a source of much amusement as the night progressed. A toast was made to Canada, for opening the country's secret vault of the best 150 home remedies ever. Our chair for the evening regaled us with fun facts about obscure cold remedies, and our Table Topics Master invented a fun game where he passed around two envelopes - one contained slips of paper naming common cold symptoms, and the other contained slips denoting unusual cold remedies. Our task was to remove one slip from the first "symptom" envelope, name and wax somewhat poetic about our symptom, and then spend the balance of the allotted two minutes explaining how the randomly-pulled cold remedy from the next envelope helped cure us - or didn't.
It's hard to maintain composure while people are talking about using outlandish home remedies like horseradish, or onion necklaces, to cure their cold symptoms. And the hilarity continued when people described exactly how they'd use each remedy to obtain relief. Snort that elderberry juice up your nose - it'll clear up the pesky catarrh in your sinus cavity! Bite into a clove of garlic - munch down that sucker like it's an apple - by golly it'll clear up your cough - and as an added benefit, continued use will keep anyone from ever getting close enough to share a germ with you again! Does chicken soup sound like a boring cure? Not if it's made with the recipe we heard! We also learned that French Canadians substitute gin for whisky in their Hot Toddies, and that the word catarrh just never gets old.
I would never have dreamed that so much laughter could ensue from discussion of the common cold, but we managed it.
There were serious moments in the evening too. One member gave a heartfelt speech about the importance of giving blood. It was well thought out and delivered. My own contribution was more serious than most of the rest of the evening too, but what I've discovered about Toastmasters is that every speech - be it serious or silly - has its merits. Whether we spend the evening laughing or nodding in serious agreement, everyone leaves edified. And fed with yummy snacks too! I think it's safe to say that each Linguist of Listowel learns something new every Thursday night, and leaves feeling good about what they experienced.
What better way could there be to spend a Thursday night?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)