More or Less
What can I offer, more or less -
within mid-winter bleak?
Perhaps less anger to distress;
more thought before I speak.
What can I offer to do more -
what habits can I nurse?
Perhaps more praise on friends I'll pour,
more kindness I'll disperse.
What can I try to do far less -
which flaws can I remove?
I'll do a tally and assess
the ways I should improve.
There's more that's good all ought to give;
more worse we ought not share -
far better ways for us to live
and of others take care.
This year I vow that - more or less -
I'll set my best self free;
I'll use the talents I possess
to build a better me.
Sharon Flood Kasenberg, Dec 18, 2018
Life is more or less an endless series of lessons to learn. No matter how much I might learn, or how much I grow in one area, I'm always certain to find some other aspect of myself that needs work.
This past year has been challenging in many ways. Always change-resistant, the universe seems intent on telling me that I need to embrace change. Always introspective, the universe keeps telling me to think less. Always thin-skinned, the universe seems to put me in positions where I'm apt to be rated, graded, and more often than not left feeling that I'm just not measuring up.
In short, the universe and I have been somewhat out of sync over the past several months.
I'm hoping we can reach a more amicable agreement in 2019. This seems like an attainable goal - as long as I'm willing to do my part to be more agreeable.
Yup - that's the issue - straight from the horse's mouth. Whenever it seems that the universe wants to teach me something, I dig in my heels. My reactions to change are automatic - I resist without stopping to consider whether the change might be good for me. I'm uncompromising in my ability to stubbornly hold fast to the status quo, even when life requires a good shake up. Perhaps this is the year I rid myself of that behavior.
Every year, between Christmas and New Year, I reassess my life. What am I doing right? What could I be doing better? Do I feel like my life is moving in the right direction? In some ways, I really do feel that I'm making progress - in spite of those times when I backslide and feel myself pulled back into the negativity that I'm always working to free myself from.
These past six months have felt like an enormous backslide. I'm tired, I'm cranky, I'm critical. Too often I've felt that I'm excelling at putting my worst foot forward. I offer the world too much of my worst, and too little of my best. I hang on to things I ought to throw away. I'm contrary.
One of the phrases I often hear is, "Let it go."
It's good advice, but not easy for someone like me; someone with a mind that needs an off switch. (Another phrase I hear a lot follows a similar vein - "You overthink things.'')
Today I participated in a "Fire communion". I wrote some words on a piece of flash paper and watched them catch flare as they were dropped into a fire pot. It felt cathartic to watch those words burn - a lovely sort of symbolism to usher in a new year. If only old habits could be released so easily.
Every person has their own list of "mores" - talents and skills that they should be intent on developing more fully and sharing more often. If you're like me, you may find yourself envying those who have obvious gifts - those who create beautiful art or music, or instinctively know how to make a delicious meal appear on the table. It can be easy to forget that kindness, inclusiveness, a sense of humour, hospitality, generosity...these are all gifts. Many of us have them in abundance - but we fail to utilize them regularly, and our skills grow rusty.
What would happen if we each reviewed our list of strengths and decided to give those parts of ourselves to the world more generously and more frequently?
Sadly, we all have another list - one that too many of us spend too much time examining. Our list of failings is ruthless; it tries hard to demand all of our attention. It constantly reminds us that we're flawed. It relentlessly tallies all of the ways we fail; we can't measure up to the expectations society places on us, and most importantly, we can't meet our own lofty standards.
This year I'm going to tear up that second list. I'm going to take those shreds of paper and burn them to ashes. That list has ruled my life for far too long. I'm going to spend more of my time looking at my other list - expanding it, and experiencing the satisfaction that comes when I've done my best with the meager gifts I have. I'm going to try harder to not succumb to envy or comparison. I'm going to accept a good backslide onto my backside from time to time. Progress is still progress, whether or not it comes in fits and starts. I'm going to quit questioning every step into the unknown and embrace the uncertainties that are part of living. I'm going to risk a few spectacular falls on my way to making a graceful leap - a leap from defeat to belief.
And I really do believe that this might be the year I learn to let it go.
Sunday, 30 December 2018
Tuesday, 11 December 2018
'Tis the Season - By Sharon Flood Kasenberg
Show Me
Christ in the spotlight?
I doubt that he'd care
whether tableau is
placed here, or placed there.
Want Christ in Christmas?
Perhaps you might start
by showing his teachings
are deep in your heart.
People are hurting
this time of the year -
lonely and hungry,
and lacking in cheer.
Go - sing some carols
to make some hearts glad,
help out the weary
and comfort the sad.
Make a donation
To show that you care.
If Christ's in your Christmas
then prove He is there.
by Sharon Flood Kasenberg, December 10, 2018
There's a large sign on our lawn that says "Season's Greetings" in large three foot green lighted letters. I'm just waiting for somebody to complain that it doesn't say "Merry Christmas" instead. Go ahead - I dare you.
First of all, if you know me, or if you've ever read even one of my Christmas posts, you'll know that I love Christmas and have no trouble whatsoever using the phrase "Merry Christmas." Most of the people I know celebrate Christmas, and so that's the phrase I use most of the time. A few times it has slipped out around Muslim, Jewish or Hindu acquaintances, and they simply smiled and said they hoped I enjoyed the holidays. No big deal. If a Jewish friend wanted to wish me "Happy Hanukkah", I wouldn't be upset in the slightest. Isn't life too short to waste time getting bent out of shape over such little things?
Sometimes, when there's any doubt in my mind I say, "Happy Holidays" - everybody seems to be celebrating something at this time of year, so why not? If by chance they aren't, it's still likely that they'll get a few days off work, so at the very least I'm showing goodwill by saying I hope they enjoy those days away from the grindstone. I hope they enjoy the days that I'll be celebrating my holiday - which is Christmas. I'm not being politically correct by saying "Happy Holidays" - just practical.
I am unabashedly non-religious these days, but I love the Christian themes in Christmas. It's a season of hope and joy - and Heaven knows we all need a bit more of those things in our lives. Every Christmas Eve, I try to make my way out to St. John's Elora to hear their beautiful choir sing. I listen to my husband's vast collection of honest to goodness Christmas carols in the car - no "Frosty" or "I Saw Mama Kissing Santa Claus" here. I love the carols that tell the story of Jesus' birth. I don't know if Jesus was actually born at this time of year, and I don't particularly care. Winter can be bleak, and a big birthday party - with gorgeous music and lots of bright Christmas lights and decorations - is a great way to add a little warmth to the coldest, shortest days of winter.
We can all get up on our high horse about how we can't display our Christian symbols anywhere we like, or worry about who greets who how - but what would Jesus say about His followers getting twisted out of shape over these trivialities when there are people in our midst with serious problems that we're ignoring while we make our petty complaints?
The way I see it, the problems in our society don't stem from "Godlessness" - but from a lack of morality. We are not kind enough. We don't show enough empathy toward others. Too many parents don't take time to really talk to their children; to teach them about compassion for others and the value of being honest, decent, and respectful. Too many fine Christians send their kids off to Sunday School once a week, and ignore their spiritual and moral development the other six days of the week. (Trust me on this - I taught Sunday School for a lot of years.)
Our problems didn't start when we stopped saying rote prayers in schools and other public spaces - they started when we stopped eating dinner together as families. They started when we - as the role models in our children's lives - started parking them in front of the television instead of talking to them and playing with them. Our problems started when we became so enamoured of our own devices that we gave them cell phones of their own to keep them out of our hair. Our problems were exacerbated by two income expectations - we, as parents got so caught up in giving them better things, that we failed to give them what they needed most - time, attention and limits.
It's handy to blame the influx of other faiths to our country as the root of our problems, and thereby assume - erroneously, I might add - that Christian morals are the only morals. I'm going to say something radical now: I've met a lot of Agnostics and Atheists who put Christians to shame when it comes to looking out for their fellow humans. I've seen amazing service rendered by non-churchgoers and non-believers. Religion, in my opinion, has most definitely not cornered the market on morality, goodness or decency.
I never cease to be amazed by the tribalism evidenced in today's society. Does it matter who goes to what church, or if the people who do their best to serve us - kindly and generously - go to any church at all? Is it our business how they choose to spend their Sundays? Would Jesus say we get to judge our neighbours based on whether they go to church? Would Jesus care how we greet each other in December? Or would he just be happy that we offered kindly greetings to each other at all?
It's easy to carp and complain about Christ not being part of Christmas. It's harder to conserve whatever scant energy we have, and then apply it to taking care of each others' needs. If you want to show that keeping Christ in Christmas matters to you, then demonstrate that you've incorporated his best teachings into your life. Be kind. Serve others. Give the benefit of a doubt to the Samaritans in your midst - they just might repay the favour.
Spend less time worrying about who believes what, and more time proving that you understand the concept of doing "unto others as you would have them do unto you." Take time for the people who matter most in your life, and for rendering kindness unto "the least of these."
And above all, don't judge your neighbour for putting "Season's Greetings" up in lights. I think Jesus would approve of the fact that I'm trying to include everyone in my celebration.
Peace on Earth - and good will toward all. Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays.
Christ in the spotlight?
I doubt that he'd care
whether tableau is
placed here, or placed there.
Want Christ in Christmas?
Perhaps you might start
by showing his teachings
are deep in your heart.
People are hurting
this time of the year -
lonely and hungry,
and lacking in cheer.
Go - sing some carols
to make some hearts glad,
help out the weary
and comfort the sad.
Make a donation
To show that you care.
If Christ's in your Christmas
then prove He is there.
by Sharon Flood Kasenberg, December 10, 2018
There's a large sign on our lawn that says "Season's Greetings" in large three foot green lighted letters. I'm just waiting for somebody to complain that it doesn't say "Merry Christmas" instead. Go ahead - I dare you.
First of all, if you know me, or if you've ever read even one of my Christmas posts, you'll know that I love Christmas and have no trouble whatsoever using the phrase "Merry Christmas." Most of the people I know celebrate Christmas, and so that's the phrase I use most of the time. A few times it has slipped out around Muslim, Jewish or Hindu acquaintances, and they simply smiled and said they hoped I enjoyed the holidays. No big deal. If a Jewish friend wanted to wish me "Happy Hanukkah", I wouldn't be upset in the slightest. Isn't life too short to waste time getting bent out of shape over such little things?
Sometimes, when there's any doubt in my mind I say, "Happy Holidays" - everybody seems to be celebrating something at this time of year, so why not? If by chance they aren't, it's still likely that they'll get a few days off work, so at the very least I'm showing goodwill by saying I hope they enjoy those days away from the grindstone. I hope they enjoy the days that I'll be celebrating my holiday - which is Christmas. I'm not being politically correct by saying "Happy Holidays" - just practical.
I am unabashedly non-religious these days, but I love the Christian themes in Christmas. It's a season of hope and joy - and Heaven knows we all need a bit more of those things in our lives. Every Christmas Eve, I try to make my way out to St. John's Elora to hear their beautiful choir sing. I listen to my husband's vast collection of honest to goodness Christmas carols in the car - no "Frosty" or "I Saw Mama Kissing Santa Claus" here. I love the carols that tell the story of Jesus' birth. I don't know if Jesus was actually born at this time of year, and I don't particularly care. Winter can be bleak, and a big birthday party - with gorgeous music and lots of bright Christmas lights and decorations - is a great way to add a little warmth to the coldest, shortest days of winter.
We can all get up on our high horse about how we can't display our Christian symbols anywhere we like, or worry about who greets who how - but what would Jesus say about His followers getting twisted out of shape over these trivialities when there are people in our midst with serious problems that we're ignoring while we make our petty complaints?
The way I see it, the problems in our society don't stem from "Godlessness" - but from a lack of morality. We are not kind enough. We don't show enough empathy toward others. Too many parents don't take time to really talk to their children; to teach them about compassion for others and the value of being honest, decent, and respectful. Too many fine Christians send their kids off to Sunday School once a week, and ignore their spiritual and moral development the other six days of the week. (Trust me on this - I taught Sunday School for a lot of years.)
Our problems didn't start when we stopped saying rote prayers in schools and other public spaces - they started when we stopped eating dinner together as families. They started when we - as the role models in our children's lives - started parking them in front of the television instead of talking to them and playing with them. Our problems started when we became so enamoured of our own devices that we gave them cell phones of their own to keep them out of our hair. Our problems were exacerbated by two income expectations - we, as parents got so caught up in giving them better things, that we failed to give them what they needed most - time, attention and limits.
It's handy to blame the influx of other faiths to our country as the root of our problems, and thereby assume - erroneously, I might add - that Christian morals are the only morals. I'm going to say something radical now: I've met a lot of Agnostics and Atheists who put Christians to shame when it comes to looking out for their fellow humans. I've seen amazing service rendered by non-churchgoers and non-believers. Religion, in my opinion, has most definitely not cornered the market on morality, goodness or decency.
I never cease to be amazed by the tribalism evidenced in today's society. Does it matter who goes to what church, or if the people who do their best to serve us - kindly and generously - go to any church at all? Is it our business how they choose to spend their Sundays? Would Jesus say we get to judge our neighbours based on whether they go to church? Would Jesus care how we greet each other in December? Or would he just be happy that we offered kindly greetings to each other at all?
It's easy to carp and complain about Christ not being part of Christmas. It's harder to conserve whatever scant energy we have, and then apply it to taking care of each others' needs. If you want to show that keeping Christ in Christmas matters to you, then demonstrate that you've incorporated his best teachings into your life. Be kind. Serve others. Give the benefit of a doubt to the Samaritans in your midst - they just might repay the favour.
Spend less time worrying about who believes what, and more time proving that you understand the concept of doing "unto others as you would have them do unto you." Take time for the people who matter most in your life, and for rendering kindness unto "the least of these."
And above all, don't judge your neighbour for putting "Season's Greetings" up in lights. I think Jesus would approve of the fact that I'm trying to include everyone in my celebration.
Peace on Earth - and good will toward all. Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays.
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